When I was in middle school I was not a good judge of friends. I allowed myself to be around people that continually let me down. They walked all over me and made fun of me behind my back. Well, in high school I was determined to see through people like that. That might be why I didn't really make good friends with anyone from my school. I went to an all girl's high school and kind of fit into every group. I was a musician, an athletic, and did well in school. I seemed to find my good friends in out of school activities like county orchestra's or honor bands. I was getting better at filtering out people that weren't helping me develop as an adult. By college I had a group of three girls that I did just about everything with. I loved my college life, but I hardly talk to those girls now. By the end of college I finally did it. I finally found the three women that made me laugh and challenged me to be better. Katie, Amy and Jessi have become the standard which I now judge new friends against. Any new friends must have Amy's sense of humor and fun side with Katie's power to motivate and inspire and, of course, Jessi's wiliness to listen and help with any problem at any time of day. These women have many other awesome qualities but these are some of my favorites.
So what does this have to do with? Well I'm starting another chapter in my life and I'm going through some of the same processes I went through when I entered high school and college. I know what kind of people I want to surround me and what I need from them. Mainly, I need trust. The most important thing I learned from my therapist was that I have to teach people how I want to be treated. I can't assume that others will understand my unsaid friendship rules. I have to educate them about what hurts me and what impresses me. It's hard going through all this again, since I finally found the friendships that made me whole. I have faith that I am here for a reason. There are people I am destined to meet and who may change my life.
This weekend I am continuing the Birthday celebration with Tera and her friends from home. We are going to the MTSU football game tomorrow and I think we are going to some local bars afterwards. If I get my shift covered at work I can go to a TN Titans game. If I go to that, then I miss the Eagles game at 1:00PM. Tough Call!
3 comments:
Sounds good, kid. (Eagles are suddenly important to me: I have Donovan McNabb and Terrell Owens in a fantasy football league!)
Red tones in hair (below) suit you nicely. You are quite toothsome. (To us old people, toothsome = beautiful.)
I watched the Country Music Top 100 Duets last night. Super show. Don't know where it was shot, but maybe you were there?
Your hair looks beautiful!
As far as friendship goes, just meet lots of people and over time you will figure out who is trustworthy or not. Don't put to much pressure on yourself for figuring it all out right away. Sometimes it's impossible to know.
I find that often the ones that turn out to be the best friends are the ones you thought were completely different than you. Once in a while, though, you just KNOW immediately. And sometimes you think you know, but you're wrong.
Hmmmm. i think I covered all the bases there.
Bottom line: Give it time.
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