Though I have had trouble in the past with true friendship, I always thought of myself as a good judge of character. If I smell something suspicious I uncover the fallacy and either forgive, or walk away. The best way to explain everything that has happened the last few days, I will direct you right to the horses month, Kassi. I'm sending you there because she wrote a long blog discussing the situation from her side. A man I was seeing (but didn't work out with) is now seeing Kassi. They went about their affair behind my back simply because they KNEW it would hurt me. These are two of the four people I know in Tennessee, and I don't know how to stay friends with them. In their perfect world, they want me to except that they want to date and still hang out and we all be best friends (La, La, La, La, La) Well, it isn't that simple. Before I really knew what Michael and I were going to do with our failing ROMANTIC relationship, I confided in Kassi. Little did I know she was going right back to him and telling him everything I said! In my mind I have two options;
1. I back away and allow myself to meet some new people.Maybe join a club at school and detach myself from all this drama.
2. I try to pretend that this all didn't just hit me like a ton of bricks and try to be friends with them both. Put my hurt feelings aside in the name of "new love." Because "if I really cared about them, I would understand."
The problem with the latter option, is that I have successful gone through therapy allowing myself to comfort feelings I don't like and teach people how I want to be treated. I feel this is huge step back! But there is that little voice in my head that says, "If you don't get past this you will be alone." DAMNIT! I don't want to depend on people that hurt me just to have a warm body to talk to. What do I do?
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5 comments:
Listen, kid, these things happen. Life is NOT a bed of roses. Tell yourself, "So it goes," and keep smiling. And make some other friends. A person can't have too many friends. (And, you always got your family. And me.)
If you and Michael didn't work out then you should be willing to let him go romantically. If you two wanted to be together then its a whole different story. It seems if they didn't care about you they wouldn't care if you stayed friends.
#1 and you know I will come down there if I have to...
They don't sound like any kind of friends to me.
Choose door number 1. And I'm right down the road... Call me!
Keep smiling and let go of the drama. You've got your path. True friends do not treat each other in such a manner. You'll find like-minded souls.
I don't mean to intrude (although I am), but hon... you just dodged a bullet on both counts. Count yourself lucky. That's an accident waiting to happen (Kassi & Michael). Hang in there. You'll get to have the last laugh. That's 62 yrs of life experience talking.
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