Stand Back Up

I know I put song lyrics on here all the time but I'm a musician and I can't help but see my life in songs. This song jumped out at me because I feel like there are people that don't expect me to make it out here. I feel like they support my efforts but they are just getting ready to console me when I run home with my tail between my legs. I don't care if I have to take out three loans and go into credit card debt, I'm not going home. And for those that find it easy to pick on a girl when she's down I only have this to say:

Artist/Band: Sugarland
Lyrics for Song: Stand Back Up
Lyrics for Album: Twice the Speed of Life

Go ahead and take your best shot, Let 'er rip, give it all you've got,

I'm laid out on the floor, but I've been here before,

I may stumble, yeah I might fall, Only human aren't we all

I might lose my way, but hear me when I say, I will stand back up,

You'll know just the moment when I've had enough,

Sometimes I'm afraid, and I don't feel that tough, But I'll stand back up,

I've been beaten up and bruised, I've been kicked right off my shoes,

Been down on my knees more times than you'd believe,

When the darkness tries to get me, Theres a light that just won't let me,

It might take my pride, and my tears may fill my eyes, But I'll stand back up,

I've weathered all these storms, But I just turn them into wind, so I can fly,

What don't kill you makes you stronger, When I take my last breath,

that's when I'll just give up, So,

go ahead to take your best shot, Let 'era rip, give it all you've got,

You might win this round but you cant keep me down,

cause I'll stand back up, And you'll know just the moment when I've had enough,

Sometimes I'm afraid and I don't feel that tough, But I'll stand back up,

You'll know just the moment when ive had enough,

Sometimes I'm afraid and I don't feel that tough,

But I'll stand back up.

She talks about darkness not getting her down. Darkness is her depression, her own ego and her fear. I won't let those things beat me either. Some days the fear of money gets to me so much that I literally freak out. I never even had a credit card until I got out of college because I didn't want to have debt. Now I'm seriously thinking about taking out another loan just so I don't have to work THREE jobs! Katie and I are already looking at much cheaper apartments for next year, hopefully that will help. I can finally turn in my in-state tuition request (had to be living here eight months first) so that's one more thing that should help.

I changed my room around today. For anyone that knows me that is a good sign. It is a "rebirth" and a huge effort to have a different outlook. My hands are still throbbing from moving my heavy bedroom furniture by myself. I was going to go to the gym this afternoon, but I think I've lifted enough for today!