I've Overlooked Her

In families, there are roles that evolve naturally. When you have a family with more than two siblings, each sibling takes on a role. The eldest is very special to the parents by being the first. There are a million pictures of them in every single pose imaginable, while Mom & Dad are learning how to be parents for the first time. The youngest is very special for other reasons. They are the baby that the whole family seems to take care of and feels an obligation to protect. The sibling in the middle sometimes may feel less special because they aren't the "baby" or the "oldest." I feel my family is no different.
My mother learned a lot with Mommak being her first child. My mother was a single parent through some of Mommak's hardest teenage years and mom tired her best to keep the lines of communication open. When it was time for AM and myself to creep into teenage years, we both had very different ways of relating to our parents. I have always been the type that shares EVERYTHING! I confessed every good and bad grade as well as every good and bad choice. AM, on the other hand, has always chosen to be more independent and self sufficient. She didn't run to mom when things were a little tough, she sucked it up and went it alone. There are still things I'm learning about now that she never shared with me for that same reason.
Her independence has not worn off with age, I just think it has been over looked. This past year has brought huge change to our family but I noticed this past weekend that AM and I really are doing the same thing, she is just going step by step whereas I am just jumping off the cliff! After AM's graduation from college, she received a position in a top county teaching 2nd grade. After only two years of teaching, she became a mentor teacher and is now training new teachers. The last few years she has been taking graduate classes as well as teaching full time. I don't know how she has the energy to do progress reports for the little ones and assignments for grad school! But step by step my big sister has climbed out of college debt, bought a home, and may very well receive a promotion at work! She has done, or is doing everything she said she would and she is only 27!
AM has been behind my decision to move since the beginning and has kept me motiviated with inspirational words, but I didn't see that her words were more from experience then from admiration of my choice. I was too caught up in myself and the fears I had, that I didn't see the struggles my sister was going through. For that selfishness I am sincerely sorry. Maybe it is time for other people to look at the people around them and make sure they are appreciating and motivating the ones they love.