Last week I was completely out of commission! I think I had a sinus infection. Starting Wednesday night I felt a horrible headache and woke up Thursday in a state of true illness. All I wanted was to sleep and blow my nose. Usually my mother is the first I call in this situation, but I felt so bad I couldn't even call her! Because I am so low on funds, I just HAD to work Friday, Saturday, Sunday, and Monday. Friday was so bad at work my eyes were watering and I had to blow my nose (and then of course wash my hands) every time I walked back into the kitchen!
Since Monday I've been studying and working on an income stream project on Reba McEntire. Did you know she not only has a hit TV show but also has her own clothing line? She has money coming in from so many streams I thought she would be easy to report on, that isn't the case so far. The project is due next week and I haven't found ANYTHING. I e-mail my professor for help, so hopefully things will be looking up.
Besides all this, I really haven't had much of a life. I'm trying to find another job that pays more and I'm working hard at school...That's it! Boring right? I haven't really gone out since I haven't been feeling well and I haven't wanted to spend the money. But my friends from home are busy!
1. Joey won 3rd place in a karaoke contest last weekend.
2. Jessi quit her job after two months of working in the North Carolina School system
3. Amy is getting ready for Grad school
4. Kateri's mom was diagnosed with cancer and had surgery yesterday where they removed everything but the kitchen sink!
5. Katie is still working on finding herself and her inspiration
6. Lauren is busy planning her wedding for the weekend after Thanksgiving
7. Erin's boyfriend Brian of nine years finally proposed!
8. Colleen's boyfriend since our sophomore year in college also proposed.
9. Tim bought a new car, won an ipod, and won concert tickets all in one day!
With all my friends either married, engaged, or "taken" you'd think I'd start to get a little restless, but actually for the first time I can remember, I really DON'T want to be in a relationship of ANY kind. The men in Tennessee have not impressed me so far and I don't feel a need to be distracted by them. I have been struggling with something though. In a little less than three weeks I'll be going home for the first time. I'm very excited about seeing everyone, but I think I'm more nervous than anything else. I'm nervous because this experience has already changed me DRAMATICALLY and I fear I'm not the same person I was when I left them. I also...Well I don't feel I've accomplished enough yet. A part of me doesn't want to come home until I've accomplished...MORE! Gotten a better job, finished the first semester and knowing I can go on into my program. This is such a different feeling than coming home from Towson University. I have so much more to prove!
I took an online test the other day to see if I showed signs of anxiety disorder. I am constantly nervous about money, grades, and my future. Of course the test said I should schedule an appointment and speak to a counselor. I guess it is the best thing for me since I'm making myself sick every other week just by worrying. I think I'm honestly had this headache for two weeks straight. Time off doesn't relax me because I just think about what coming up and whether I'm ready for it or not. SO I'm guessing I won't be able to relax until December 17th when my finals are over.
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You are doing fine, darling. You don't have anything to prove to anyone. Time moves at its own pace. Don't rush. Deep breaths. The seasonal changes around here cause headaches. I've been suffering, too. This is one of the worst places in the nation for allergies, etc. They don't put that in the literature...
We need to get together this week. My treat. Email me! {{hugs}}
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